Something else - to think about........

When I was getting a divorce, and the world seemed as if it was upside down one small thing started to help. A friend and I began a game of -- "Tell me a story." Whichever one was in need, the other would begin, in detail, a fictitious tale describing problems that were different, seemingly unique. For example -- "A friend of mine just called and she has a hang nail on her 5th finger..." (that could start the laugh) and it would go on from there. When done, we were laughing and feeling oh, so much better. OK, some days needed more than one story.

What happened was that our minds were taken away from what our own personal experiences, even if for a few minutes. Those few minutes began to add up as memories that we could return to, rather than the memories our minds were creating of misery, uncertainty, loss, fear, etc.

When love leaves - whether through death, divorce, separation, it can rock your world.

Everyone benefits when their minds are taking care of someone or something else. If need to, start small, take small steps. Make a list of steps to take and be specific. This works great with children. Don't leave them out of the healing process, in fact, get them involved. If they have lost someone they love, help keep them connected. Have a memory sharing time - I remember when.... Get out pictures of when the kids were small, sitting on Grandpa's knee, etc.

Volunteer to help others, bake cookies, paint a room, go sledding. Start seeds for spring planting, plan a memory garden. OK - in the South, where there is no snow, you tell me. I'm always looking for ideas. Go hiking, play tennis, create a small play. Note all things create action and can be done with others. The important thing -- a start is made.