We and They

"That which we call sin in others is experiment for us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

And, please stay strong, as the other person really does not complete you, they can enhance, benefit, they can also drain and discourage.

Each relationship is unique, as unique as the people within it. Sometimes there is no right or wrong they are simply doing what comes easiest for them. Rather than stand and work or stand and identify or stand and simply be for a time, some need to feel they are moving in a direction not always known; yet, moving feels correct. The "easy" thing to do is to move on - similar to changing jobs or changing clothes.

Some are listening to what others think -

There is no right or wrong answer as what is "right" for one can be "wrong" for another.

Suggestion: Support your friends - ask for support, not opinions - and unplug, perhaps for specific segments of the day. Eat a meal together, cook a meal together, admit sadness, share what brings happiness and joy.

Please try to avoid: "you always, I never," - "you should" "why."
Perhaps, choose - "This is how I feel,..." "Please talk with me..." "I am sorry..... honestly "

Again, there is no pattern or diagram for resolution - the relationship, needs to matter, it needs to be a priority.

"The fresh start is always an illusion but a necessary one." - Eleanor Clark

7 Year Itch -

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony - 7 years

There are many other couples that I could use as examples of the 7-Year Itch or crisis that seems to occur at that 7-year mark.

On the outside looking in and looking back there were grumblings and disconnects that were obvious and left to fester, grow and undermine. Eyes, ears and thoughts move to others who are happy, laughing and carefree - oh, where are those days? He does not listen, she does not understand, he does not care, she is too busy, he is too busy, he loses his job, she loses her job, there is a crisis, he is, she is, he is, she is.

It is not, she is not, he is not, we are not - they are, she is , he is, it is. We were.

It does not happen overnight. The beginning, the middle and then the end.

Right now in the heat, as things are slowing down from necessity - those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer. Whatever level of your relationship........

Suggestion: Stop - pay attention - fertilize your relationship, water it, pluck the weeds, give it some shade and take the heat off and relieve some stress. Return your attention to each other - let go of what "others" think and find out what your loved ones think. Have lemons, make lemonade.

Freedom - July 4th - Give thanks and celebrate

Good Morning - Perhaps not what you may think when see this picture. LOL - Typically there are marching bands and flags waving. Yes that is very true and very much a part of this celebration July 4th is all about the freedoms provided by our forefathers that we continue to enjoy today.

Thought for the day - consider yourself a Freedom Ambassador.

When hear someone complain - wish them a Happy July 4th Freedom Day or something else that you create which rather than complain about their complaint - offer them a different perspective. You may hear them differently as Freedom creates the opportunity for people to complain or to discuss or to rant or to get on their "high horse" or to share God - basically to share what is on their mind.

And, also to blog as I have done for a few years.

Happy July 4th

Who are you listening to?

Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.
--Proverbs 12:15, NLT

First, you are in my prayers each and every day. I am prayerful that this site is blessed with comfort and warmth and my anchor is God.

Who are you listening to, who are you hanging around. It truly does make a difference.

I've been nursing a lower back challenge through physical therapy, ice, heat and wise counsel. Progress is now being made.

First there was the reality that help was needed. First muscle relaxers, then x-rays then physical therapy from where knowledge and understanding came. I had different physical therapists, and each one brought me new and different knowledge all which added to what was provided before.

This entire process which has been a new one for me, offered me the opportunity to better understand what others experience. This is not a sciatic nerve challenge which I discovered tends to be what most people think.

Each situation is different - people are individuals -- who need wise counsel.

Who are you listening to and what are you listening to?

Namaste

MEMORIAL DAY - A DAY OF GRATEFULNESS

Memorial Day is approaching. May I suggest a moment or more to acknowledge, thank, and celebrate those who have paid the ultimate price for the freedoms and opportunities that we have.

"Let no vandalism of avarice or neglect, no ravages of time testify to the present or to the coming generations that we have forgotten as a people the cost of a free and undivided republic." -- General Logan - May 5, 1868

Guilty am I to first consider it is as 3-day weekend and begin to plan for outdoor activities and adventures. Every family who has lost a member to any of the wars or the non-wars, skirmishes, battles, no doubt, holds every day in thankfulness as well as grief and sadness.

One way to be grateful - thank someone who has served, or who is serving now in the military. Let them know their service is appreciated. Thank a policeman, thank a fireman thank a nurse a Dr. take the day to be grateful that we are able to openly speak, openly live our lives as small or as large as we choose. Our lives are about choice, and to this day choice is still alive and well.

Regards, cheers and congratulations to the Syracuse Gang who graduated this year. Thank you for all of your gracious comments and sharing with others your successes and challenges. Best wishes as you go forward and pursue many different endeavors. Please don't hesitate to continue checking in. This is truly a family and a community. Cheers!!!!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

Today is a day to celebrate mothers. It might be considered international women's day as even if a person has not given birth, each woman has likely nurtured, cared for and been an example for children perhaps without knowing it.

Some examples are likely not ones that are beneficial for children to emulate. If we sit at the table to eat and converse, children will follow. If we say please and thank you - children will follow. If we eat our vegetables - well, we eat our vegetables. That is still an area of challenge with some children and adults.

Dad's please consider today an opportunity to show your children how to be nice to their mom's and others also. Mom's please take this opportunity to say thank you to your children, as without them we would not be moms. Then, perhaps share yourself with someone else, an example for our children to help others.

And, Thomas the Train in Medina continues to be about the family. Think Thomas is there again today - the weather is beautiful - the zoo - a park, a playground - a nap. After church today for this Nana - there is a plan. And, spending it with those I love and loving others as I go.

Happy Mother's Day!!!!

Update as of Today April 30, 2011

Good Morning -- Wow - please first thank you Roy and family for all your efforts and energies and to think so close. And, yes, had a tan rain coat on and so unfortunate that with all the noise and activity Easter Sunday morning we missed each other.

One of these days for sure, and my best to your and your family. The first presentation is past, and I'm so grateful to many for the opportunity.

I've been blog quiet; until today had a focus unique to me and it took some time to process. On Tuesday will be starting Physical Therapy and to better understand a challenge with my lower back. Also will try acupuncture, any suggestions for a practitioner in the Rochester area? Prior to the April 20th presentation, I've became aware of discomfort which moved into real pain in my lower back.

My church activities, the pain and my day job have kept me busy. As prior blog posts mentioned once a decision and plan is created, life has a way of relaxing for other things and possibilities to appear.

There will be another presentation, and the date (other than a holiday week), time location AND directions will be clearly available.

First times are typically a daunting challenge, and once accomplished offer a sense of freedom, greater possibility and awareness.

Namaste