Sunday, July 24, 2011

We and They

"That which we call sin in others is experiment for us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

And, please stay strong, as the other person really does not complete you, they can enhance, benefit, they can also drain and discourage.

Each relationship is unique, as unique as the people within it. Sometimes there is no right or wrong they are simply doing what comes easiest for them. Rather than stand and work or stand and identify or stand and simply be for a time, some need to feel they are moving in a direction not always known; yet, moving feels correct. The "easy" thing to do is to move on - similar to changing jobs or changing clothes.

Some are listening to what others think -

There is no right or wrong answer as what is "right" for one can be "wrong" for another.

Suggestion: Support your friends - ask for support, not opinions - and unplug, perhaps for specific segments of the day. Eat a meal together, cook a meal together, admit sadness, share what brings happiness and joy.

Please try to avoid: "you always, I never," - "you should" "why."
Perhaps, choose - "This is how I feel,..." "Please talk with me..." "I am sorry..... honestly "

Again, there is no pattern or diagram for resolution - the relationship, needs to matter, it needs to be a priority.

"The fresh start is always an illusion but a necessary one." - Eleanor Clark

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Susan---Helen of Greece NY---this is exactly what i have needed to hear. My husband and i are going through some challenging times. this makes so much sense as i am going to try it.

Thank you for being here follower 3yrs. I am going to right now go and ask for support and friends are too quick to judge as i have found myself listening to others when i need to be listening to myself and my husband.

Anonymous said...

Susan--- Mary Jane of NJ---follower of yours for 2yrs. Thank you for your post coming at the right time.

Support is important instead of being judged or comments being made. I have a boyfriend that i am in love with and friends are judging me for having a relationship with this man.

How true if you listen to others you can lose something that is very special to you.

Susan you are correct it's important to listen and hear as i have the final decision.

Love the picture and look forward to reading and seeing more pics

Your a blessing from God thanks for being here

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan----Josh of Ontario Canada-- I am regretting listening to others as it was the day before my wedding and these so called friends had pressured me so much no to get married that i became overwhelmed with all the judgements people we giving me.

If i listened to my self and my future wife I would be married today. I am in the process of attempting to getting my future wife back and see if she can forgive me for listening to others as i am very much in love with her.

Picture is awesome as usual follower of yours for 3yrs.

Susan so glad God chose you to provide these remarkable insights.

Look forward to more

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan---Rachael here of Webster NY---thank you for this comfortable place to come. Each relationship is unique and if your friends are not able to support you then that is not a true relationship.

I am glad i listened to myself like another one of your comments mentioned and talking and listening to my husband that makes a difference. True friends support one another as you can listen to what they have to say and in the end the relationship is still between you and your husband or boyfriend or girlfriend.

I listened to friends before and i lost my husband once will not do it again as it took quiet some time getting him back.

Now I have been married to my husband for 15 yrs yet it certainly took patience, love and trust on both parts.

Love the picture huge fans of your photographer. follower for 3yrs.

May God continue blessing you with your writing.

Look forward to reading and seeing more pictures

Anonymous said...

Hey Girl it's Roy what can I say another fantastic post. This is just what I was looking for as my Sister and Brother-in-law have been having some challenges as each are listening to others. It's ok to listen and take away from what is being say and sharing there thoughts at the same time can not base that solely on your decisions.

The decision on how to respond need to come from with in and talking to the other person involved.

Susan you continue to amaze our family suggestioning things at the right time. God continues to bless you.

Have a blessed day

Anonymous said...

Susan- David of IN---thanks so much for this my wife and I have been going through some rough times as i will admit i am on the computer too much. I am going to unplug myself everyday for different time frames and spend with my wife and get us back on track again.

A relationship takes nurturing and watering sort of speak and we have gotten away from talking to one another and I want that to change for my wife and I.

Thank you for this as i have some things that i need to work on and change first one being rekindle the love that I have for my wife as I love her.

I can not pin point when this all started however, relationship can take a turn quickly if your not paying attention. Follower of yours for 3yrs my wife for 4yrs.

As always outstanding picture from your photographer. I thank God for bringing you to us.

Anonymous said...

Susan- Lisa of NJ--- Love your concept i am going to try your suggestion on the next relationship. I was in one yet my boyfriend was not able to work through the challening times. My boyfriend and I broke up 3 wks ago. Any thoughts on when a relationship is over the time frame before you see someone else if you have known this other person for awhile and what do you think is a good time frame before 2 people share there feelings for one another.

Our relationship has been out of sorts for awhile now and everyone has needs and I am missing my boyfriend very much and he just was not willing to take the steps to get help with his drinking. It was time to do something as was tired of being a punching bag.

Follower of yours for 2yrs. Your blog has been the bright spot of my days. Love the picture look forward to reading and seeing more.

I thank God everyday for providing you to us.