Saturday, June 12, 2010

Acceptance - Conflicted

One thing I think God provides me with are good ears to hear. I read and heard - rather than mention individual names -- comments posted recently that people are not being heard by those they love. Whether it be a husband, wife, children, co-worker, or boss. Children not listening, a husband on edge, Everyone wants acceptance, respect, love, encouragement, and to be valued. If the important person in your life is not listening to you, my first question would be, WHO HAS their ears and eyes. If not on you.......

Life today appears to be so fast and furious - I'm just getting over a self designed weekend, that included a nap, reading and leisure. Much needed.

Suggestion: Find time, first for yourself. Ask - what is the problem? What needs to get fixed. Then determine if that is a mountain of a task. If so, take a small bite and consider that problem. Think of possible solutions, yet, also be open to the possibility that another person might have a great solution.

Then ask for time with that special person. The first step is to let them know the thoughts you speak are your thoughts, and you would appreciate that they simply listen. Second step, ask them what they heard. Then, don't interrupt to clarify. Allow them to hesitate and use their own words.

This can be a great start to moving into acceptance and removing conflict.

Oh, happy day. Time to move into it!

Cheers!!!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan---Jane of WI ---omg thank you so much for this post and the suggestions you provided as I am going to confront my husband and find out what's going on as he has been on edge for weeks and it has caused some discomfort in our home as I need to ask the hard question if he is seeing someone else as challenging as it is for me yet I can not go on much long without not knowing what in the world is going and what's up that is causing sleepless nights and not eating much yet still eating healthly i just am not able to stomach much right now.

I so appreciate you being here as I am a follower of yours for 2yrs now your words are so comforting and you help me to relax.

Love the picture your photographer has done another outstanding job at capturing the details.

Your sight brings me joy and peace. Will share with you once I know. Yet my stomach is turning as. We have been married for 8 yrs now.

Keep up the great job

lulu said...
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Anonymous said...

Hi Susan--Rosemary of GA-thanks so much for this. As there has been tension at home with our family and I finally got up the nerve to confront my daugther and asked if she was having sex after some prying my daughter finaly admitted she has been and she is 14 yrs old.

I wanted to have this talk to be as comfortable as possible as we sat afterwards and had a sex talk which my daughter knew more than I thought she did. She is also pregnant which my husband and I just found out. We are so heart broken over this sitiuation way too young.

I am at such a loss as to how to be there for my daughter. We're hurting she has not even lived her life yet.

Any suggestions on steps that can be taken as my daughter is defensive on talking about. I'm making all attempts to be calm.

Please let us know your thoughts from your perspective on this.

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan--Jane of WI just wanted to share with you that I confronted my husband and he has been having an affair now for about a month. I am so upset yet I asked him to leave and he's asking me what for.

My husband does not think he did anything wrong his words were this is not the first time that I have done it and going to keep doing it.

Then had to call my son to pick me up as my husband started pushing me and smacked me in the face. That it's I'm done. I'm at such a loss at the moment. After 15 yrs of marriage it comes down to this just makes you wonder what goes on in there heads.

Thanks so much for being here as this is my place to have tranquil moments.

Look forward to reading more as I have been reading your other past post which have been great.

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan--Lindsey of CT---ok will share also after reading the other comments. I confronted my husband if there was someone else and the answer was not.I have been married for 10 yrs now.

This is so challenging to let out that one I had taken a half day off from work and came home as I was going to surprise my husband by cooking a romantic dinner. I walked in the house and my husband was with another woman in our bed.

I told him to leave and he had pushed me down the stairs had a broken arm and a black eye. He told me that i was not good enough, not deserving, was not pretty enough the list goes on yet this is difficult yet i need to let this out as this just happened last Friday afternoon.

I am hurting as I loved this man and I began to think it was my fault. I realize it is not. Not quite sure where to begin on putting the pieces back together.

Thanks to the other readers that commented as it made it a bit easier to share and get it out there as it is not good to keep things in.

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan--Rebecca of Ontario NY-this was a remarkable post as I confronted my son in a loving way that I had suspected he was either having sex or planning on having sex soon. I am a single parent and when i confronted him he did admit that he has had sex once and my son has lots of questions. My son is 15 yrs old.

I was very loving with him as I brought him over to my brothers house and asked him to take him out for the day and spend talking to him about sex and what it means as my brother is a roll model for him and besides it nicer when it's coming from another male instead of your mother as my son will just will not open up fully with me.

This is always a delicate area and I don't want him getting someone pregnant before his is ready.

So my brother is going to do it in a pleasant and gentle way. Will share back with you as my brother is spending the day with my son on this Saturday.

Thanks for being here with your wonderful sight.

Awesome job by your photographer as well

Anonymous said...
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